I'm not saying where, because the guy is sitting on 200 grand's worth of original Seventies denim, and if anyone in Camden found out, there'd be nothing left.I need a suit, but from my nipples up, I'm a 12-year-old boy, from my nipples down I'm a 37-year-old man, so I need made-to-measure, and that's expensive.I'm a black-belt in dynamic self-defence, and train regularly Body-fascist culture still rules. I like tighter clothes, because my arm mobility is impaired by baggy T-shirts I go to a little shop in Aberdeen. I even suggested that if it would be useful and save time and trouble, I would gladly take the necessary photographs for the passport.Freud family photosMrs Freud, a warm, motherly woman, took me around the apartment. The living quarters had typical massive, upper-middle-class furniture The floors were covered with Oriental rugs. There were objects of a personal nature, mementos, photographs of children (above), and decorative crystal and China objects, but no ancient art. Mrs Freud pointed proudly at some framed documents and showed me the pictures of her grandchildren.

She stopped at a photograph of Albert Einstein with an inscription, and spoke with admiration of this wonderful man n. Kos or Kusadasi Lunn Poly has seven nights in Kos on a room-only basis for pounds 265 per person based on two people sharing, departing Manchester on 7 August, and 14 nights in Kusadasi in Turkey for pounds 389 per person in the 3D-rated Barbados Apartments The flight departs Newcastle, 7 August. Available from 800 UK Lunn Poly shops. DubaiFlightbookers (0171-757 2444) is offering five nights in Dubai for pounds 359 per person up to 14 August staying in a four-star resort.TunisiaAn offer from Panorama (01273 427777) which caught our eye is seven nights in Tunisia at the Hotel Cleopatra in Hammam-Sousse for pounds 359 per person half-board departing Birmingham on 8 August.The DordogneAnd if you fancy something a little different, Travelbag Adventures (01420 541007) has an eight-day "Dordogne a Pied" walking holiday for pounds 495 per person leaving on 7 August. Including return train travel from London, local transport (when not on foot), seven nights' accommodation, some meals and a tour leader, the trip explores the pilgrimage town of Rocamadour and medieval Martel.IsraelImaginative Traveller (0181-742 8612) has reduced its eight-day "Israel Connection" tour starting on 11 August by pounds 70 to pounds 665 per person. The price includes return flights to Cairo on KLM from Heathrow (and regional UK airports), transport, seven nights' accommodation, meals and a guide. Highlights include a walking tour of Jerusalem's Old City, Nazareth, the port of Akko, and the Dead Sea.The eclipseIf you haven't made plans for the eclipse yet, Voyages of Discovery (01293 433030) has slashed prices on its 11-night Eclipse Cruise to pounds 695 per person (originally pounds 1,740-pounds 1,970).

Leaving on 7 August, you'll view the eclipse off the coast of Le Havre.All details and offers correct at time of going to press.. THE GREATEST moment of your life is either a dozen days or five months away, according to which camp in the travel industry you believe (personally, I would side with neither; an industry whose business is selling dreams is not one in which unswerving faith is likely to be rewarded). Depending on your circumstances, you may have thought that an event such as getting married, surviving a Cabinet reshuffle or your team winning the treble was of supreme significance. But the travel trade would like to persuade you otherwise. The 12-day wonders think you should travel somewhere to observe the last total eclipse of the millennium, which takes place on 11 August.

I have been fortunate enough to witness a total eclipse, in India, and can confirm that to witness the light draining from a cloudless sky is a truly, er, cosmic experience worth travelling a long way to see.The significant word there is "cloudless". There is still time to make plans for being in Romania, Turkey or Iran on 11 August. These are locations on the path of totality where the weather is likely to be fine enough for you to see the hole in the sky.Most of us, though, will stay closer to home, in the far south west of England or northern France. (Page 11 of next week's travel section will preview the French options.) But do not be taken in by Ealing Council's promotion: "Total Eclipse of the Park, a unique event to celebrate the solar eclipse from one of the most beautiful vantage points in London". There will be no total eclipse in London, or anywhere in the UK apart from south-west Cornwall, south Devon and Alderney.Wherever you are on the day, if there should happen to be a break in the clouds, do not look directly at the sun. The eclipse glasses that are being sold for spectators along the line of totality are even more essential for people in the rest of Britain, who will be able to witness a partial eclipse (about as much fun, I imagine, as only partially surviving a Cabinet reshuffle). Deep in the retina there are no pain receptors to give an early warning, and infrared rays from the sun can cause permanent eye damage.